If you are
one of the 80 percent of menstruating women who suffer from PMS, you may be
worried about the impact it is having on your relationship with your husband or
partner. As well as the painful physical symptoms of PMS, many women report
mood swings, depression, and general tearfulness at this difficult time of the menstrual cycle. Your emotional symptoms might vary from (physically) violent
outbursts to a mild crying session, often directed at those closest to you.
They can leave you struggling to cope with the demands of family life, and
leave your partner feeling rejected, frustrated and confused. Fear not! Some good
communication and practical planning can help you to reduce the tension in your
relationship.
He Needs To
Know PMS Is No Joke
As women,
we have all been driven crazy by a male friend, family member or partner who
thinks it’s hilarious to brush us aside with a well-timed quip about ‘that time
of the month’. The comic image of the enraged premenstrual woman has become so
ingrained in the minds of Western males, that your partner might not realize your
PMS is a serious issue. After all, he can never physically experience what you
are going through. Communication is the key – talk to him. It is as much in his
best interests as yours to be well-informed. Encourage him to read up on the
subject, the information here and on the menstruation pages of this website would be a
great place to start.
Plan Your
PMS Into Your Relationship
Most women
suffer from PMS symptoms from around the middle of their menstrual cycle until their
period begins. However, this is not the case for all women, and the best way to
avoid the tears, conflicts and monthly relationship doubts is for both of you
to know when PMS is about to strike. Try using a calendar on the kitchen wall to
record your PMS symptoms cycle by cycle. After a couple of months, both of you
will have a visual reference for the days on which you should avoid stressful
family events or those deep and meaningful conversations. You might even decide
to take time alone on certain days and minimize your contact with your partner.
If this is what you need as a PMS sufferer, you should not think of it as a
sign of a weak relationship, rather as a realistic approach to a shared problem.
When Things
Get More Serious
If your
behavior is violent or potentially violent due to PMS, and your partner and/or children
may at risk, you must contact your health care provider immediately for advice.
No matter how serious or how mild your symptoms are, help is available from
your doctor. You and your family need not suffer in silence.
