Breaking Up Is Hard To Do
Breaking up is hard on both halves of a couple. If you're the one ending the relationship, you may be worried how the other person will take the news that you're opting out. If you're the one who got dumped, you may be feeling hurt and not a little bit angry. No matter on which side of the equation you find yourself, breaking up generates tremendous anxiety and stress.
It may help relieve the tension to review the reasons the relationship must end, and how this will benefit both of you. If there is a logical reason for the break up, going over the facts may help move you from a plane of pure emotional anguish to that place of acceptance you need to achieve in order to move on. Making that switch from feeling anxious to calm reason may not be easy. You may even want to hold on to your sorrow, but time does its eventual magic with even the most heartbroken souls.
Relationships tend to have a natural progression with most of them ending for the simple reason that they have run their course. In most cases, there is a burst of initial attraction followed by a mellower phase. When the attraction wanes, one half of the couple may come to the realization that the other no longer excites them. As a consequence, they may begin to feel unsatisfied in the relationship, think about ending the relationship and may even begin to look at other relationship possibilities. At this point, the question is not whether the couple will break up, but when.
Breaking up doesn't mean you have to rage at each other or be insulting. A relationship can be ended in a mature fashion. If a couple handles things in a sensitive way, both find their way toward understanding that this is how is has to be, and achieve true resolution. They may even find they remain good friends after the break up.
Of course, if you're the one who is ending the relationship, there are some risks involved. You may end up deciding you made a mistake and want to get back together. But the other person may not be interested at that point.
If you're in an abusive relationship, the stakes are higher. Breaking up may invite harassment, a worsening of the abuse, or even stalking. Think hard before you break up, and plan things so that both your physical and emotional well-being are protected.
Breaking up does have benefits. There is relief in ending a relationship where there's no longer affection, for one or for both of you. When there is a lack of affection, the relationship is no longer healthy. Ending the relationship will help you recover from the stress of pretending you're still part of a loving relationship. Remember that if one of you is unhappy, the other is bound to be feeling that negativity on some level. It's healthier for both of you that this relationship comes to an end.