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Irregular periods and proper cleansing method

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Im almost 20 yrs old now and I've been havin irregular periods for around 3 years now. I never missed any, but sometimes it starts 3 days before the date and sometimes 5 days late. The thing is, it changes every month! There's always a difference of atleast 3 days! is that some sign of menopause? :(

*I have stress problems, most of times my brain is a mess and I think a lot... a bit too much.
*I forget things....A the extent that I forget what task was assigned to me 2 minutes back, i forget a lot...there's just no limit. I just read it today that forgetfulness is also an indication of menopause.
*My daily routine aint any good....I sleep around 6 AM and get up around 2 PM, and I certainly cant fix it nowadays due to some certain reasons. (during workdays, i wake up at 6 AM, the rest from 4 PM - 7 PM and at night, I sleep at 2 AM)
*I dont take a lot of fresh fruits and vegetables :-S Im workin on it...and will try to take more of such stuff.
*I have severe hair loss problem, my hair strands fall out like they're just not attached to the scalp. Im taking 'Seven Seas' (fish oil) tablets for that....but no effect so far :-S

I wonder if Im close to menopause ].[
The worst part is, Im just engaged now...and might get married after few years. Im worried about fertility. Ive never had sex so far...never even kissed (so there's no chance of pregnancy causing menstruation crisis :P)

Besides this, Im wondering whats the best way of cleansing 'it' after the menstruation cycle of every month. Using a soap to clean it off is fine, right? or does that cause some infection or something? I really need help with this. So far in my life, i had always ignored the needs of the lady in me :-S
Just in case soap is not fine, what should I use?

I would really be very thankful if you have answer to my questions...or just any help to offer...or any related information or experience to share.

Thanks and Regards