sex and menopause
5 Replies

I have navigated through menopause and currently have only a few issues. Occasionally I get hot flashes but they don't really bother me anymore. What does is the issue of sex. I have little desire and it hurts like heck. And yes, I am using Estring and lubrication. And yes my gyno exams are normal. I'm frustrated because my dear husband of 35 years still wants it even though he has some problems. He got a perscription for cialis and became so rock hard I thought i was going to p out, literally. When I read info on this issue I feel like I am an outcast and abnormal - that all these older women really want sex and boy toys and have multiple orgasms and I'm sure my husband reads these articles when he does his research. What I'd really like is in light of the fact that I've given myself to my husband physically for over 40 years, why can't I have him emotionally now. I'd love to cuddle, hold hands, exchange intellectual intimacies without the hovering possibility that this has to culminate in a sexual act. I'm not interested in taking testosterone and growing hair or subjecting myself to other unnatural drug supplementations that have shown potential cancer - related dangers ( and I do have some family history of female cancers)just for the purpose of making my husband's sex life fulfilled. On the other hand I do not want him straying to find fulfillment for his needs elsewhere. When I read "sex after menopause is wonderful" articles, I sense they may be written by men or pre-menopausal women. Also - I have not worried about getting pregnant for years and my children have been out of the house for years, and I am not a prude so these issues have not been issues for me as some of the articles put forth. I'd be interested to hear what other post menopausal women have to say. Thanks.



losing libido while going through menopause is normal. if your hubby can't understand the see-saw of emotions, then perhaps your GP can explain this to the both of you? This way questions can be answered easily. If he is embarrassed you can discuss menopause while surfing the web and do some research together. it helps when the both of you know what to expect.

hope this helps!



support is important in this very trying period in your life and you should have it, especially since menopause can be a very long roller coaster ride!



it helps when both partners know what to expect during mennopause. do your research together so that your partner will know what to expect and what to do.



I agree. Support is important when sailing on uncharted territories. Im sure your husband will understand eventually. So hang in there!



you may want to try this "MX Womens Multi-vitamins" in which it helps out reduce the symptoms of menopause and at the same time this may fight the signs of aging. we need to have support to our health and vitality while we are experiencing menopause and it is appropriate for you to help yourself still get healthy.



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